Sesame Street Live and Letting it Out

I tried yesterday to sell our Sesame Street Live tickets seeing that I would not be able to go.  I had great hopes that I would be feeling better.  Well after still not feeling better yesterday I tried to sell them.  Then I asked Brendon out of curiosity if he would take Olivia on his own.  He said he would.  I think he is more confident with driving to Atlanta and doing the parking etc.  So they left today after lunch and I cried because I couldn't go and I was a bit nervous.  But they did great and had a great time! I am so happy they went.  When they got home Olivia told me all about it.  She told me that Elmo took Abby's wand and they did lots of singing and dancing.  Not many smiles in the pictures but she did have fun!

Earlier on Facebook I posted a message to all my friends about what was going on.  I didn't want to write some long drawn out status about what was going on....if people want to know they will either ask or keep reading the blog.  I felt ok today.  Still not 100% but tried to rest while Olivia and Brendon were gone today.  But just know that we are fine (or as fine as we can be) and your words of encouragement and prayers are well appreciated.  I had to let it out...and sometimes letting it out makes things a tiny bit better.  

What has been going on

Well since Tuesday and getting that dose of Methotrexate for the Ectopic Pregnancy there has been a whole lot of not feeling well.  There have been moments of feeling good but then I feel awful.  I am going to be honest....this is hard.  As I talked with the nurse today she said to me, "This is a loss and you need time to grieve and you need time to feel better both mentally and physically."  From headaches, to nausea, to some cramping, and some numbness in my leg, and now I feel incredibly hot...and yes I already took my temperature and do not have a fever.  But the nurse said more rest...and take Monday off of work.  I really don't want to miss work anymore...writing sub plans is really hard to do and I feel awful the students have a substitute.  But right now I need some time to rest and recover.  We thank you for all your prayers and support through this difficult time.  I have to say Brendon has been Super Dad and husband to the rescue the past few days.  I am thankful that he has been here to help, not sure how else I could do it.

Even More Complicated

I thought it was complicated enough yesterday.  Today when I woke up I was not feeling well.  I felt like I was going to vomit any minute but didn't.  I noticed when I left work that I was having some discomfort on my left side...just felt weird.  By the time I got to the doctor I was worried and I tried to tell the lady at the desk but she cut me off.  I waited a few more minutes and let someone else know and they told me to tell the nurse when I got called back.  I told her what was going on and she brought me in a room.  I did my lab work and then my doctor gave me an ultrasound.  What they saw 2 weeks ago was still there and looked bigger.  Therefore she suggested we start the Methotrexate treatment.  So then I had to have more lab work- yup both arms today! I am one lucky girl.  After discussing all the options with her, this would be the best course of treatment.  I didn't know that the medication was actually chemo. So basically today I had a round of chemo and it stinks.  I am sore right now at the 2 injection sites but feel not like myself.  I am home at least the next 2 days on rest- no lifting, no exercise...just rest.  Don't worry Brendon is home taking good care of Olivia and I.  Right now we just need some prayers that this works because if it doesn't we can repeat it with a stronger dose or have surgery where I may lose my Fallopian tube.

Life is so complicated sometimes....

Complicated

Do you ever have moments in life when you think that it could never get more complicated?  I had one of those today.  While I prayed and prayed for a big fat zero on my blood work...well guess what it went back up to a 63!! Ugh...I am just so frustrated and mad at whatever this body is doing.  So tomorrow I have to go back for more blood work...I think I need my own personal parking place now at the doctor's office.  My doctor is really hoping it is a lab error (and so am I) but everything in my life is always complicated and never easy.  I hope on Wednesday to have some better news...

Olivia and Brendon had a great morning at Gymboree and Lowes.  We had a pretty good afternoon besides pooping in her pants while talking to the doctor (her reason was she was having too much fun chasing Jake with her stroller). Olivia made up for it though by going on the potty later in the evening. 

Here is Olivia enjoying her Oreo cookie after lunch...her shirt explains it all...Too Cute!

Daddy's Dove Hunting Day

Usually Brendon dove hunts the first Saturday of September but this year he did not get selected for the quota hunt he usually does.  So his friend and him made dove hunting plans for today.  I had grand plans of taking Olivia to church or something out of the house.  Well this stinker kept saying she had to go.  That means she needs to go #2.  After SEVERAL false attempts....she finally went at 1:40...but she went on the potty so that is all that counts.  Don't worry we did laundry and cleaned up a little bit in the meantime of sitting on the potty. 

Olivia and I did see something cool around dinner time.  Talk about the Very Hungry Caterpillar coming to life.  In the paper on Saturday they mentioned the Hickory Horned Caterpillar and the Saddleback Caterpillar can be seen.  Well we saw one of them...not sure which on the back door.  We were watching it and I guess it got to close to a spider's eggs.  This little spider probably the size of the dime wrapped that caterpillar in its silk.  The caterpillar put up a good fight though.  It was really neat to watch!

Brendon left about 10:30 and got home about 7.  He got one bird! He showed Olivia and of course Jake and they were both excited.