Day off with Daddy

Olivia was lucky and got the day off with daddy on Columbus Day while I had a planning day at school.  Lucky girl! They had a fun day at Fort Yargo! They went fishing, had lunch, did a hike with some Geocaching!

Not a Good Friend

There are things that I know, and many things that I do not know.

Right now I do know this.  I am just not a good friend at the moment.  In fact I would vote myself the worst person ever to try to be friends with at the moment.  It takes a lot to admit that, but if I am speaking truth, that in fact is the truth and nothing but the truth.  I even said it out loud to a colleague the other day. 

I am in no way complaining about my life or feel the need to explain this to someone or anyone in general or even try to gain some sympathy.  This is just my heart being shared with you. And NO don't try to be my friend at the moment, it just won't work, trust me, it won't work at the time being.

I know me well and I should know me well being 37 years old.  A little too well I can say- 37 years of knowing me is a LONG time.  Right now in this season of life there are priorities.  There is a difference between "I don't have time" and "Its a priority."  At times I am overwhelmed with my priorities- in no particular order- wife, mom, daughter, teacher of 24 students, runner, the list can go on.  Those right there are my priorities.

Being a mom and a teacher is very difficult.  I try to get some work stuff done at school, but it is hard to get done, and I seriously don't ever get time to sit down, LIKE NEVER EVER.  I really try not to do work stuff while Olivia is awake at home after school.  My focus is her and what our family needs done- laundry, dishes, cooking, homework, the list could go on.  I grade papers while she is at dance or gymnastics, and do all the rest of school stuff after she goes to bed- and yes even on a Saturday night at 10:00 pm I still have papers to grade. There are nights I am up to 11:30 doing school stuff, and I am just deflated and tired to do anything else.  Being friends with a teacher is difficult so please understand and give us teachers some grace, and by Friday...we are really tired!

Right now this season of life is a bit crazy with some organized chaos mixed in. With Brendon working midnights, life is just different and what was balanced, is now a little off balance. The struggle to keep the balance of everything is so very difficult.  You can't understand what it is like until you live it.  He is coming home when we are leaving in the morning.  He is sometimes sleeping while we are awake.  When we do see each other, we try to give each other breaks for running, biking, and hunting and also family time.  It is rare we all sit at the dinner table together for a meal but when we can, we do, that is a priority to us. 

Right now I choose to find joy in this season.  These people are my tribe and I need to love my tribe and be with them. We make the most of our time together. For me, my tribe of 3 is my priority. 

Our circle has grown smaller in this season.  The puzzles pieces of life aren't always fitting together, which is an adjustment. Some things just don't fit anymore.

Right now I have to take it all one day at a time.  Each day I find joy and happiness. It is really hard to admit that one is not good at something, especially at being a friend.  I know I can improve on this, but not right now in this season. Finding balance is hard.  This is my journey and I need to find joy it.  There are more things I find to enjoy daily, than to be unhappy and frustrated about.  I have let some things go which have helped me with finding that joy.

Always looking forward...

Beginning of October

October was a busy month! We had lots to do on the weekends and lots of fun things at school!

We started the beginning of October by going to Fort Yargo to listen to some blue grass on a Friday night! It was fun and the weather was comfortable. 

On Saturday I did a trail run at Yargo.

That afternoon we headed to Monroe and their Fall Festival.  The Festival was kind of spread out, which was ok, but we ended up in more of the shops than the festival it seemed! It was fun and we found a new bookstore!

Yes the hay ride took is through a cemetery which led to some interesting questions from the little one!

Welcome October

Fall has arrived.  It has been 90 degrees in a few days.  It will be 80s this week still.  We had some cooler weather this week though.  It felt pretty nice.  It was even cool enough Saturday morning that I wore long sleeves running...

Saturday morning at Sandy Creek Park

Welcoming Fall to our house on the driveway

End of September fun

We had some end of September fun which included a concert in our downtown green space.

Being a superhero....

Opening a restaurant with assigned seating...

Spending LOTS of time with mommy while daddy had a bike race and worked.

We went to the Dollar Tree for something and she brought her purse and wallet and purchased 2 things ALL by herself!

We went biking and running!

And we made pudding popsicles! Tasty! 

To close out September we made pizzas and had a campfire!

Writer's Block

Maybe it is working full time.  Maybe it is just not having time.  Maybe it is just trying to find a balance between home, work, and me.  I know I said I was going to get better with the blog...and I just haven't.  I almost feel I have writer's block at times. Maybe it is just lack of time in general.

The blog was started to track our journey and share our story.  I did a really good job until...I am not sure.  I am not sure if I was ever doing a good job at writing.  I am not a writer, author, expert or do anything fancy.  Sometimes just getting words on paper make me feel better.  I don't ever want to hurt anyone's feelings with what I write.  Most of my stuff is personal and it is part of my story and what makes me...well me. Brendon even suggested we change our blog to a camping blog...not sure how I feel about that.  I like my mom journey, because when I get old if I start forgetting, I can look back at this...if the internet still exists!

But I need to ....

and get back into...

that is my goal...

She is 5 and 1/2

Today Olivia turned 5 1/2.  That is just crazy to me.  In six months she will be 6.  She is growing up way to fast.  She is such a problem solver, she has a solution to everything.  She is so curious and wants to know everything. She has such a kind heart for others.  She has no idea how much joy she brings to us, and our family,  She is a true blessing to our hearts and home.

18 months old

5 1/2