6 years later

It has been 6 years. 6 years I can't believe.  The grief and the pain still linger.  It comes in waves still. But this time around Thanksgiving 6 years ago, I still remember like it was yesterday, my water broke and I lost out first baby.  It is still painful and emotional.  One of my favorite books, Hope for the Weary Mom has a great chapter, Chapter 8- When Life Hurts Too Much, which I read and still cry when I read that chapter.  At times I am not ready to lift the lid of my box and let go and forget.  This is part of me, part of our family, and part of what we have become.  I know one day I will have to share this story with Olivia.  I can only hope and pray that she understands.  I am so grateful and thankful for God's blessings for our family.  He taught me the greatest thing of all- patience.  From now on I use what else I learned- hope and grace.  Hope for each and every day.  Grace, because life just get messy at times and everyone needs some grace.